Nick: Maeve ---My Yahoo profile

---Witches Brew!

Quote: ~Welcome to my bar, pull up a stool and have a few shots. I am the mother of a beautiful, yet challenging son with autism. And yes, I'm a witch.

---Hawt Asian Chick
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---Catfish
---Acidman
---Walrilla
---Lelsie's Omnibus
---FLOWER!
---Great Reader!
---Jimbo
---Libby
---Evil Blonde
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---Cure Autism Now
---Surf Camp for Autistic kids
---Soldiers Angels
---Hearts 4 Heros
---A mom's view on Autism
---Operation Love from Home
---Talk About Curing Ausitm

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Thursday, March 31, 2005

They really need to hand out a jar of lube at the gas pump to make the ass fucking you get easier to take!

I just paid $2.43 a gallon for gas. Can we all say WHAT THE FUCK?! Needless to say, the short bus is costing me a small fortune in gas.
I am now coming to terms with the fact that Aunt Selma has to move. Her rent will be going up to $2,600 a month by July. Her neighbors said she can come over any time to park and use the beach. A lot of her neighbors just use thier places on the weekends. Must be nice to have that kind of money. The beach that will be her new place is stil a private beach, so I'll have a good chance of getting goat puppy out there with us. Only problem is now I will have to carry 2 chairs, 2 boogie boards, umbrella, snacks, dog on leash and autistic child in tow. I can probably, hopefully get pudd'n to carry the snacks & towels. Turns out we have to go down some stairs and use the under ground pass, so a wagon is out of the question.
Tonight Steve and I took Goat to the beach for a walk. I sat on Aunt Selma's deck and watched the sunset when we were done. I have come to the realization that some how, some way I want my own beach house to live in. I've always been more of a "forrest" type gal. I love all the pine trees and shit like that. But I've come to appriciate the beach more since having pudd'n. He lives for the water. The water is very soothing too. Nice glass of wine, sitting out on a deck, watching your son & dog play in the water below. Or having a bunch of friends over cooking fish & steaks on the grill. Yeah, that sounds good. I'm in the mood for a party. I think I'll have one April 30th. Night before Beltane. I'd have one ON Beltane, but I have to work. Pot luck Beltane Eve party.........yeah, that's the ticket!

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

We got everything resolved with the marks on Pudd'n. It was an accident, he was pushed by another student into a gate while going on the play ground. It was not one of the mean kids, it was "Tank boy". A big loveable kid who was just excited to get out.
It was a beautiful day out and since it was Pudd'ns half day, I wanted to do something fun with him. We ended up going to Aunt Selma's. I am going over there as much as I possibly can before it is sold. Luckily I did not start blubbering once I was there. Pudd'n is so happy there. I brought Goat puppy and he had a blast too. The water was too cold, so pudd'n was ready to go home after a bit over an hour.
After dinner we went for a walk around the neighborhood and fed the ducks in the pond. Goat Puppy really wanted to go after the ducks. A true retriever he is!

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Some one is in a need of a good ass kicking..........

I bring Pudd'n home from speech therapy and as usual, he goes into his room and strips down to his skivvies. After a while I go to check on him and I notice these HUGE red scratches on his chest. WTF?!? Those were NOT there when I dropped him off at school this morning. On closer inspection, he's got a huge bruise on his knee. Now either he was falling off of something and some one grabbed him from behind and left the marks on his chest trying to break his fall, or some one is bullying my kid. There are two boys in his class that are highly combative and beat the shit outta any one with in striking distance when they get fustrated. It is usually the aids that get the most damage from these kids. So I called the teacher and was NOT satisfied with her answer of "I don't know what happened". The aids had already gone home for the day and she could not question them. I then called the principal. He is going to look into it himself. I am going to do some serious grilling of staff myself when I drop Pudd'n off for school. I'd better have some satifactory answers tomorrow. You DON'T mess with MY child. I WILL FUCK YOU UP AND ENJOY DOING IT.
On a happy note, the 20 year old buss boy was checking out my ass! I just about fell over when Vince pointed it out.
Vince: (clapping me on shoulder) Hey Mrs. Robinson!
Me: Huh?
Vince: Paco here was checking out your ass!
I then turn around and sure enough, Paco is all flustered and red in the face.
I then have to explain to Paco who "Mrs.Robinson" is. He gets all excited and asked if I would be his. Uhhhhh how about NO? No works for me. I'm MARRIED. That fact does not seem to phase him, I just rolled my eyes at him and told him to go buss some tables. Dork!

CHILDREN, PLAY NICE!

Sandy and Zonker are at it again. Go check out The Dirty Ashtray for your daily laugh. Sandy is evil. I love her............

Monday, March 28, 2005

If you want a REALLY good laugh, head over to Eric's site at "Straight white guy". Eric is out of town and foolishly gave his friend Acidman free regin of his blog. I just about pissed my pants when I read the post and the comments that went with it. I made the mistake of reading while in class. Papers were graded and the sub was up front giving the next lesson. I'm over in the corner trying to discreetly read the blog and not laugh out loud.
I needed that laugh after my emotionally charged crappy weekend.
Thanks Acidman!!

Sunday, March 27, 2005

Ok, because I need a laugh real bad right now. Have had a crappy emotional weekend. Here are some of the things that have brought people to my site.

hot drunk babs (Google): She claims she gives "blow job"kisses

masterbate using candles and other home made things (Google):
Uhhhhhhhh, I don't think so slappy! Go to a sex toy shop!!!

sperm reciepe (Google): a reciepe? Is that like a secret ingreident in some foods??

+davinci +martini (Google): a new drink for me to try?

horse riding orgasam (Google): Yeah, there is nothing like having an animal between your legs.

"my panties were wet" (Google): Maybe you need depends??

WHAT DOES ERIN GO BRAH MEAN? (Google): Well DUH!

who is nurse wratchet (Yahoo): One of Jack's better movies

Saturday, March 26, 2005

Feeling blue...........

Today we got together with Steve's family for an early Easter. We do that every holiday. I love it, we get to see every one on both sides of the family now. Any way, it was really hard for me today for some reason. Pudd'n has two cousins that are just a couple of months older than him. I watched Scott & Chris play together, along with the other older cousins. It broke my heart. My son should of been playing with them. He should look forward to these family functions instead of whineing and hideing out in a back room. We bring his tv and videos for him. The younger cousins would come in and watch tv with him, but for the most part, everyone ignores Pudd'n. I've tried to get him to play with them, I've tried to get them to interact with him. I feel like such a failier some times. I remember happy memories of playing with my cousins growing up, I hear the stories of steve and his. What kind of memories will my son have? None. So hear I sit, trying not to cry or let steve know I'm ready to cry.

Friday, March 25, 2005

Lili here...in no way shape or form are you allowed to move to North Carolina - this Goddess has spoken!

Now back to our regularly scheduled blog....

P.S. I uh, fixed the links that had issues - they needed a closing tag and I renamed Maeve's "About Moi" to "Witches Brew" (per her instructions even though I wanted it to say Bitches Brew) and moved it to her "About Me" Section....which is not about me, Lili, it's about her Maeve - just to clear any confusion.

Can any one help me out?
What is North Carolina like? How are the schools for autistic kids?
What are the houseing prices? How is unemployment? What is the weather like? Can any one tell me anything?
If so, please email me at irishwhiskey66@yahoo.com

Thursday, March 24, 2005

The second to last link on my sight here is a little blurb "about me". I tried doing like Lili over at "flights of fancy". She did 100+ things about me. I could not think of 100 things, so I stole what Eric had up at his site over at Straigh White guy. So if you'd like, click on "about moi" and enjoy!
Nuh nite.

What is your "secret code"?

I don't know if anyone else does this, but me and my friends always seem to come up with stupid little sayings that only make sense to us in our drunken stupor. Sayings that still make you giggle like an idiot when you are sober and people think you ARE an idiot for saying things that just don't make sense. Here's a few examples:

For me & Bables: Fake cheese and good pussy

For me, Lili & Venus: Redrum (from the stephen king novel), pecan pie and Las Palmas

For me & Athena: are these clothes dry?

For me & Dru: I made in my pants! El Yeaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh

and my all time favorite, for me & Spaz:
You have NO idea how wild I am

Cancun flash back: Spaz and I are sitting at the desk of the activities directors for our stay. We only have one day left and we have to choose between snorkeling or horseback riding. Pablo says to me "so you want to be a cowgirl for the day eh?" I smile at him and tell him I ride horses all the time here in Calif.
Now mind you, I'm not fluent in spanish, but I know my way around it. And I sure as hell KNOW when some one is talking about me. Pablo and his buddy Hector are all but visibly drooling all over me & spaz. Spaz is wearing a cute LITTLE dress and I'm dressed in my usual low cut black something (you can actually see the outfit if you go to my yahoo picture site. I wore it to my birthday party) Spaz is flirting up a storm and being her normal obnoxious self (babs can concure this!).
Hector: So do you ride a lot?
Me: Yeah Hector, there is nothing like having an animal between your legs.
At this point Spaz is doing everything in her power not to bust out laughing. I know Hector & Pablo are talking smack about us, so I just sit there with an evil smile on my face. Spaz starts rambling on about something and Pablo says to her: OOOOo you are a wild girl.
Hector asks me: Are you wild too?
I give Hector my best evil cheshire cat smile and I purr:
Honey, you have NO idea how wild I am.
Hector promptly glups and slides his chair back away from the table.
At this point, Spaz is literally on the floor with laughter. As we walk away from the table she leans in to me and said "you scared that poor boy". We never saw Hector again.

Goddamn I hate 3:30 am wake ups............

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Very Sweet............

As most of you know, I am on the "angel writing" program. Two times a week I get the name of a soldier wanting mail or care packages. I rarely hear from any one that I've written, so when I do get a letter back, I get pretty excited. One such letter I got this week and inside for Pudd'n was a sticker. At the top of the sticker it says "Black Knights" and on the bottom it says "HMM-264". It has a black horse head from a chess set inbetween. Pudd'n actually looked at it and studied it for a few minutes. I have it up on his book shelf on display.
I sent the soldier a thank you letter. Maybe I'll take a photo of Pudd'n holding the sticker. That is going to be tricky, pudd'n does not pose for pictures much any more, but I will give it a shot.

Does this bird belong in this family or what??

One of my newly aquired birds can sing the first few bars of the "twilight zone". It's a crack up and definitly fits this place!
I stopped at the store and got them some new toys and treats.
I also used my new yoga dvd and all I have to say is HOLY SHIT! I'm going to be soooooooo sore later on! This guy had me bent up like a pretzel! Holy mother of pearl!

Pour some sugar on me................

Got that song stuck in my head! Got two new additions to the family. A pair of cockateals. A friend of a friend is moving out of state and they needed a new home or their outside birds. Outside? I can handle that! So, here we are with two new birds. The only downside is that they are male & female. What the hell am I going to do when they lay eggs??? I've raised everything but baby birds. Well wait, do chickens count? I've raised baby chicks when I was 17.
We didn't have our "taste testing tues" last night, which was fine by me really. I was exsauhsted, but could not fall asleep until midnight. I hate when that happens!

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Not only have I fallend "off the wagon" with W.W., I've been dragged behind it for a few miles. I should be getting some new yoga dvds in this week. Hopefully they will help me better with the stress in my life. Food and booze are not the answer.
Speaking of food, tonight is "taste testing tuesday night" at work. Should be fun, always is. I just hate having to stay so late.

Monday, March 21, 2005

My last nerve..............

Just as I am continplating on how to get rid of a dead body (steve's), Athena pops up on my I.M. and puts me in a better mood. For now, steve has a reprieve. Fucker is skating on thin ice. He's becoming more like his father which is a major no no.
shape up mother fucker because I'm NOT putting up with it again.

Hear that?
It is my son throwing a major temper tantrum. Over what you may ask? Wearing underpants.
Yes, underpants. I'm lucky (as most of you know that has been to my home)that my kid even wears that. Sure, it may be ok NOW to let him run around naked. But what happens when he hits puberty? Pudd'n will be nine this june. I DON'T need to be seeing his "parts & things". Especially when he hits puberty! So hear I sit, listening to his latest tantrum. I can thank my mother for this, she lets him run around naked. I'll get my last laugh though. SHE can put up with his tantrums when he gets pubes and he's at her house for the night. It's just like when Bart changes his swim trunks under a towel ON the beach.

Me: DUDE! what the hell are you doing? Go in side and change
Bart:What Aunt Maeve?
Me: what if that towel falls off? Goddamn it, I don't want to see what you are packing! For Christ sakes! I used to change YOUR DIAPER. Get in the house!

Sunday, March 20, 2005

You're known for starting trouble. But you play it cool. Besides, no one can resist your sharp eyes and quick wit. *They* eat from the palm of your hand. Though you have weaknesses, which may have deadly consequences, you, are resurrected, as if the gods themselves breathed immortality into you.

Take the What Pulp Fiction Character Are You? quiz.

And check out badmofowallets.com!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO AUSSIE!!!!!!!

Stolen from Lili over at Flights of Fancy

i am: 5'10
i want: a cure for autism
i have: a lot of love to give
i wish: my son would speak and be potty trained
i hate: violence against children & animals
i fear: who will love and care for my son when I'm dead?
i hear: music and my husband doing dishes. My son "stemming" in his room
i search: for peace of mind
i wonder: if my son will ever imerge from his prison of autism
i regret: not listening to the Goddess and following her path sooner
i love: my son & husband
i ache: when I am away from my son
i always: love to have a party
i am not: a mean person.
i dance: to drums or if I can find a good partner than can lead
i cry: when I fear for my son's future.
i am not always: tactful, blunt works better for me
i would like: to have peace of mind for my son's future
i write: sloppy
i lose: paitence with people who ask advice and then don't follow it
i win: at life. I have a beautiful son and husband that puts up with my shit
i confuse: myself all the time
i need: to go horseback riding every day
i should: drink less (gasp!) and follow W.W. better

Saturday, March 19, 2005

So here I sit, the sex Goddess that I am. I am in my flannel jammies, curlers in my hair and lepord print slippers. Yep, the object that fantasies are made of. ROFLMAO!
Any way, am having a good weekend so far. Finished up Pudd'ns bedroom. Got lots of errands done. Now to sit and relax and have a few glasses of Bushmills Irish cream. YUUMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

CRAB MEAT DEVILED EGGS

1 dozen eggs
1/4 c mayo
1/2 lb crab meat or imitation crab
1 tsp minc garlic
1 tbl sp minced capers
2 tbl sp caper juice
salt
white pepper

cook eggs (tip, keep an eye on eggs, once water starts boiling, time it for 9 min and then remove from heat. Then you won't get that ugly green ring from boiling too long)
separate yolks from whites. put yolks in bowl and mash with fork.
Add ingriedients and mix well. spoon in to eggs. chill
There ya have it. I got this receipe from Emeril a few years ago. Everyone LOVES it. Enjoy Pam & Sandy!!

Friday, March 18, 2005

I can't believe you just fucking said that..............

After a wonderful phone call from Sandy this morning, we head out to get some breakfast and run errands before getting the love of my life from my mother's house. The place we wanted to go to, turned out to be closed and would not open for another 40 minutes. Well FUCK! So we head over to the only other place in town for a meal. They have out side seating and we had the goat puppy, so we sat there. As we pull up steve says "holy shit Maeve, that's Ken."
Ken was a man steve worked with until recently, Ken had to leave and go on disability. Ken had also just lost his son to the war that is going on. Well, it's been almost 1 year, but to us, it is just like yesterday. So we take the table next to his and start chatting. And during the conversation steve says:
"Is your son coming down for the parade tomorrow?"
Ken just looks and steve and says "my son? steve, my son?"
(now mind you when Derick was still alive steve would allways ask about his welfare and we even sent a nice big care package for him).
I was ready to kick steve for the way he phrased the question, he should of said "is your YOUNGER son going to come down and attend the parade with you?"
Poor Ken was ready to start crying, steve looked like he wanted to crawl into a hole and die. Steve blundered on and rephrased the question, Ken mumbled that his younger son had too much homework and would not be coming for a visit. Unfortunatly, the rift is still there between the father & son. We all managed to choke through the rest of our meal and I do my best to keep the conversation light. Told amusing and never ending stories of goat puppy and what he eats. Told him cute things about Pudd'n, any thing, anything to try and ease that poor man's pain. When he left I gave him a big hug and tried to zap him with as much healing energy as I could give him with out being obvious. I then sat down, looked at steve and started crying. Steve apologised and I could tell he was going to be beating him self up for a while on how he phrased the question. It was an honest mistake.
We ran our errands, came home, took a nap and then had a quick and satisfying fuck. Now I have to get ready for work. I wonder how busy it will be. The Swallows Day Parade is tomorrow (as long as it does not rain) and the town is usually jumping all weekend long. I was going to go down to C.C and see Kerry, but with the festivities going on, you can't pay me to go down town!

Oh my goodness, did I REALLY eat that much?

Holy cow did I pig out last night! I am so bloated today it is not funny! There were barely any left overs last night, which made it easy for Steve to clean up. That man has the kitchen ALL in order! Why am I up so early when I can be sleeping in? I've got a raging sore throat, apparently I've run myself down trying to get this place in order and now I have the latest bug that is going around school. I think Puddn may have it too, I'll get his update when we pick him up from grandma land today at noon. Luckily Steve is still snoreing away. Bart & Lisa actually came over last night with their father. Shocked the hell out of us, they've never come over in the past, so we didn't bother inviting them this year. Well Steve's mom invited them and forgot to tell us! Pissed me off only because I thought I would not have enough corned beef. Luckily I did, I had made a bunch of side dishes and mom had even made a big pot of Halushki. Not that that is any where near an Irish type of food, but it's a good filler! Bart & Lisa were selling cookie dough for school, I think that was the real motivator for them to come over. We only see them or hear from them when they want something. Oh well.
I tried to stay up to see Kerry, but the bar was busy and she would not be getting out until after 11pm. I dragged my tired ass to bed at 10:30 and promptly passed out. I wished I had taken more photos, but it was a pretty mellow evening. Bables only ate my soup and that also counted as her "drink" for the night. (It's whiskey soup!) She'll have to come back and play when she is over her cold! Lili brought her son Jo with her last night. He and Bart seemed to have a nice time chatting. Lisa was playing with my crystal collection I have on my altar. I gave her a book to look through to see if she could identify what I've got.
Dru came over early in the day to help out. I told her "sit in that chair and don't move". I don't like people in the kitchen when I'm cooking. Well at one point I let her stir the green beans, I had to pour the batter in the cake pan. Then I realized I forgot to coat the pan and had to pull it out, dump the batter back in the bowl, was the cake pan and coat the damn thing. Dru, being the smart girl she is, did not laugh (too loudly) at my tired cranky ass. Well, the advil is kicking in, so I'll see if I can get some sleep now that my throat is not hurting so bad. buh bye!

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Good friends and good food............

Have a new photo of me & Lili at my yahoo site. If I was bright enough, I'd post it here. Had a great evening. Feeling all warm & fuzzy inside.
;)

Happy St. Pat's to you all.
I've already started hitting the Bushmill's. My friends and family should be here soon to partake of the feast I have prepared. Here's a joke for you a friend sent me today.

McQuillan walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time
> removing the olives and placing them in a jar.
>
> When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, the
> Irishman started to leave.
>
> "S'cuse me", said a customer, who was puzzled over what McQuillan had
> done, "what was that all about?"
>
> "Nothin', said the Irishman, "my wife just sent me out for a jar of
> olives!"
>

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

SHIT, PISS, GODDAMN, MOTHERFUCKER, COCKSUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aunt Selma has to sell the beach house. The $2,400 a month space leasing is depleating her retirement fund. She can't find a full time job. She's been living at the beach house for 27 years. She's already bought a new mobile home, it's a cross the street. Not on the beach, there is a beach access, but it won't be the same. Can I get the goat puppy over there? We won't have clean bathrooms and now I'll have to lug our booze & food too. I'm trying not to be selfish about this, but what the hell will my son & dog do for fun during the summer months?
GODDAMN IT!!

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

OOOOOOOOo I finally thought of something!
How old were you when you lost your virginity and where?
Mine was in the church parking lot with Mark G.
Mind you, it was HIS church. I never attended church until I got married.

Do I make you horney? Do I make you RANDY? YEAH BABY YEAH!

I've got a new book and GODDAMN does it have me all hot and bothered!!!! I feel like a cat in heat, I'm ready to rub up against anything that will stand still long enough. Hell, Ohmee at work was looking pretty damn good! Slip in some Puddle of Mudd in the cd player and I'm all ready to go!!
Ok so since I can't think of a single thing to blog about other than the fact I'm horney as hell, I'll steal a subject from Amy's site over at Scooby snax.
Would you like to meet me? Is there any one in the blogsphere you'd like to meet?
I'll put a twist on this, I'll list a few people I'd like to meet.

Paul: I'd love to give you a big hug, give you the love your mother never could.
Sandy: We'll need to take photos so we know what the hell we've done. I'll keep you so blind stinking drunk you won't know what hit you. I'd take you to the finest dive bars and sex shops we have to offer.
Eric:heh heh heh heh.......if only we were single.........
Jason (Sandy's husband): I'd take you to the Pleasure Chest, you'd find every sort of perversion your heart desires there. ;)
Bent: Ok, I'll go shoe shopping! Then we'll peruse Laguna and I'll take you to the drag show.
Ordianary Joe: I'll get you a REAL woman that appriciates all that you do.
Well that is all that my sleep deprived, alcohol brain cells can think of right now. If I forgot you, I'm sorry. I've been up since 2:30 am.

It's going to be a long damn day. Pudd'n got us up at 2:30 am. He's still up too. Fuck, I have to get ready for work. Double fuck, I have to work BOTH of my jobs today!!

Monday, March 14, 2005

well despite my exsessive drinking this past week/end, I managed to loose just over another pound. Guess all that busting my ass with yard work, wall paper stripping, painting, dog washing and dog walking. I just may get into that little red bikini yet this summer.........
My house is juuuuuuuust about ready for this thursday's soiree. And I'm tired to prove it! So tired I can't keep a train of thought and blog any thing.
Later........

Sunday, March 13, 2005

Weekend recap:

Steve, Venus and I get to the Irish fair. We get up to the ticket counter and mr. smart ass says:

"I need one senior discoutnt (points to me) and one student discount"
the girl laughs and gives us the student discount. Venus gets up to the window and the girl says " I suppose you'd like a student discount too?" To which I replied:
"yes, as a matter of fact she is a student.......a SPECIAL ED student!"
I am laughing for a good 10 minutes after that, I amuse myself! We spent the next 3 hours wandering around, eating food and looking at the wares that were for sale. Venus and I found some kilt wearing hotties and we started giggling like we were in jr. high.
By the time we left, I was rip roaring drunk, finished all three of my flasks. I drunk dialed Spaz (she called today to see if I was hung over) and then I called Lili. Her step son's party was still in full swing, so we dropped off Venus, picked up Pudd'n and headed over there. We had a great time playing basketball and eating the wonderful cooking C's mother had made. They lowered the basketball net, so Pudd'n was able to make some baskets. It was a great time.
Today we went down to the mini farm in town, new owners had taken over and they are doing a good job at remodeling. We had fun petting the bunnies and feeding the goats. A mini donkey had free reign of the place. We went up to the main house so I could drool over the exotic parrots the sell. I saw a sign out for "help wanted"........hmmmmmmm I wonder if they give an employee discount?! Any way, I found a lovely red macaw to play with. He preened my hair, I was going to ask him to pluck the gray ones, but then I'd be bald. I hated having to put him back. Any one got $1,800 they want to give me for a bird??

Friday, March 11, 2005

Got Pudd'ns room all painted a pretty blue. Venus came by last night and offered to help, so I took her up on it! Hot damn!
Some how we both got blue paint in our hair. I also got the mulch down in the yard and fresh bark too. Things just may shape up for the party after all. Now all I have to do it get the boarder up in Pudd'ns room. He liked the changes we made, he checked everything out when he got home today (he was at grammy's last night).
Tomorrow is the Irish fair, I can't wait!!! Last year as we were pulling up, Venus pointed out a couple waiting to get in that had their Irish Wolfhound with them. Steve barely had the car stopped and I was flying out of it to go pet the dog. I LOVE Wolfhounds, if we had the room, I'd get one! Once we got in the fair, we proceeded to the petting zoo and acted like 7 year olds. Venus & I dig petting zoo animals. I wanted to take the goats home. I'm looking forward to the food, dancing and men in kilts.

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Just for Sandy (the dirty ashtray)

You’re stuck inside Fahrenheit 451, which book do you want to be? ..
Any book dealing with the Karma Sutra

Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character? …
Aragon from Lord of The Rings

The last book you bought is:
Cottage Witchery by Ellen Dugan

The last book you read:
The Davinci code

What are you currently reading? …
The Murder List, Julie Garwood

Five books you would take to a deserted island.
The Stand- Stephen King
All of the 'stephanie plum"novels by Janet Evanovich
(one for the money, two for the dough)
All of the "higlander" novels by Diana Gabaldon
(James Frazer & Clair)
Cottage Witchery by Ellen Dugan
All of the Harry Potter books by J.K. Rowlands
Any type of "witchy" books
Yeah, with the "series" books, it's more than 5. But who gives a fuck? You going to argue with me? *menacing look*

Who are you going to pass this stick to (3 persons) and why
FUCK!~
Ok, Lili, because she does not have enough to do in her life.
Paul, because he's so smart and reads lots of stuff I'm sure
Dru, because I'm sure she's got some smutty stuff hanging around that she reads.

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

1. When you are sad - I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue - I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile - I will know you finally got laid.

4. When you are scared - I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried - I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining.

6. When you are confused - I will use little words.

7. When you are sick - Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

This is my oath...I pledge it till the end. "Why?" you may ask, because you are my friend.

Remember: A good friend will help you move. A really good friend will help you move a body. Let me know if I ever need to bring a shovel.

Holy shit am I whipped............
It was Pudd'ns half day so I took him to grammy's so I could wash my stinky dogs. When I got home I tackled the wall paper in pudd'ns room. We are redecorating, I got 98% of the shit off of the walls. Now my back is killing me and I have a sneaking suspicion that my arms & neck will hurt tomorrow. Visons of getting his room all ready before my St. Patty's day party are looking pretty slim. So much shit to do!
I am bummed that Athena won't be able to make it to the party, but am looking forward to kicking back with everyone else.
Will some one come over and give me a back rub??

Have you seen the latest H. Potter movie where he blows up his snotty aunt like a balloon? that is what I feel like right now. Ohmee puts way too much salt in the food some times. Last night was our bi weekly "taste testing" after we closed. Man are those things fun. Between the wine, the food, the diet coke and aunt flo (who finally showed up thank you very much) I am swollen up big time. My fingers look like sausages and I feel like shit.
The cheifs were being obnioxious last night. They were taking the clams, cracking them open just a wee bit, exsposing the fleshy treat inside. They would then act like they were performing cunnilingus on the clams. Fuckers! So between that and my Irish music I was listening to on my way home got you last night's drunken post. I almost deleated the fucker too.
Goat Puppy is my new shadow, he is wrapped around my computer chair. It used to be Jack that was my constant compaion, but now all the poor old dog does is sleep. Well boys & girls, it is time to get my sorry ass to school to screw with, um I mean develope young minds........

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Give me a Lass with a lump 'o land..............

The fire is roaring, the flutes begin to play. The violin chimes in with the drums. It is spring, you can smell it in the air. The warm breeze caress's your flesh, you feel ready to burst forth yourself......
There, across the fire you spy him. Tall, long, thick dark hair. His back is broad and his arms are ment for pulling you to his thick chest.
His kilt brushes the top 'o his knees and you think of licking his thighs that lay beneath that kilt. His muscular thighs......he smells musky......he's been hunting and he's ready. The music plays and you swing and sway to the beat, your nipples brush your shirt and they ache with wanting to be touched........by him.
The music really begins and you begin to dance. You hope to catch his eye and you do. Your hips sway, your rosy lips part and your eyes speak of hidden disires. You grin at him, no man can resist you and they all want you. but you want none other than him. His dark eyes call to you and as you dance around that fire you know that this is the night. Every one is up and dancing, it is spring and everyone is ichting to get out one way or another. You eye each other, the pressure builds. Your thighs ache..........round and round everyone dances, raising energy. You two manage to dance out of the group and into the trees......
He's hard and you are so wet, your juices are running down your thighs. You kiss, long, hard and fast. you can feel his hard erection pressing upagainst you and you wimper with desire. You can feel the bark from the tree you are pressed up against of. He lifts his kilts and then your skirt. His Long hard shaft drives up into you. You cry out in pleasure and ride him like he's never been ridden before. He thrusts deeper and deeper in to you as he bites your neck. His smell, the smell of the forrest and the smell of the fire over whealm you. The Fey are out and dancing, the majick is in the air.......
How's that for drunken ramblings????

START ALREADY YOU FUCKING BITCH!!!!!!

Aunt Flo is due TODAY and she is being a fickle bitch in getting here. I'm all sorts of bloated and ready to kill some one.
I've gotten my fridge all nice and cleaned out, damn did it ever need it in the worst way. Tomorrow is the dogs. Pudd'n will go to grandma land and I'll take the stinky beasts to the do it yourself dog wash. Next week I'll be having company over for St. Patty's and I need to get the house in order. Damn, I'm going to have to break down and dust & clean. Ugh!
I'm looking forward to this Sat, we are going to the Irish fair up in Pomona. Venus will be driving with us this year and she asked me to pack her one of my many flasks. I think I'm going to go with Bushmill's this year. Steve, our wonderful non drinking husband will tote our drunk asses to and from. Hmm, I've never seen Venus drunk, bitch better not puke!!!
I am SO not in the mood for going into work tonight. I just want to curl up on the couch with a blanket, bottle of whiskey and a good movie. I want my mommy!

Monday, March 07, 2005

I want some nachos and I want them NOW!!!!!!!!!!
I want cheezy cheezy nachos smothered in a shit load of pico de gallo.
I want some fine Irish whiskey to wash it all down with and top it off with something chocolate.
I want to eat all this from the patio of a cabin in the woods. I want to hear crickets chirping and watch lightening bugs flick by. I want to hear my wind chimes play a tune in the gentle breeze.
But most of all I want those damn nachos.

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Had great fun yesterday with Athena. She dragged over her dirty panties and other assorted laundry. We whipped up some magik, did laundry, went shopping and had dinner. Aussie called while we were at price club, I got to chat with her a bit. She said "oooooo so you are shopping with TWO autistic kids are you?" I laughed as I looked over and both Pudd'n and Athena were going up and down the book isle checking things out.
On our way into the store, Pudd'n started to fuss a bit, being a true man, he hates shopping. I put my hand in my purse and told him "momma has your crack!" and out I whipped his favorite candy. He got a big smile and started to hug me. He was a happy little clam for the rest of the trip.
After dinner I proceeded to get quiet "pissed" as Aussie would say. We finished up Athena's laundry and she was on her merry way. Of course Aussie called, just missing Athena. Poor thing had to listen to my drunk ass ramble on the phone. Ah well, a sign of things to come when she gets her cute butt out here to live.
This coming up weekend is the Irish festival. Goddamn I can't wait!!!

Drunk blogged not allowed!!
LOL

Thursday, March 03, 2005

Oh Reeeeeaaaaalllllllllyyyyyyyy part 2.

During tutorial in school today (class where kids go to work on home work)I was helping Kim out with reading the lines for a skit she was in. Brenda was sitting next to her. Now Brenda is a nice kid, but she has a big problem with lieing. Bald faced ones too, see right through those suckers.
Any way, Brenda notices the Pent on my necklace and pipes up with:

"My mom's friend just found out she was a witch! her friend put a hex on some one and they DIED".

Needless to say I "fixed her little red wagon" and damn quick too. I will NOT put up with some one purposly promoting ignornace and fear. I made it VERY clear just what a real witch is and it's not some one that hexs and kills some one.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Hmmmmmmm........Imagine that!

Went to C.C. tonight for ritual. Janet was there, it was nice to see her. During ritual we got paired up with different people to do some spell work. Janet and I ended up together. She has moved back in with her husband and she said they are very happy. She also told me that Geraldine had some BIG drama back in Dec. Oh REEEAAAAALLLLLY?
I bit my tounge. I my sarcasim would of been lost on Janet.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

To my own baby sister and a few girlfriends.......

A married woman who said her husband now wanted a divorce passed along these tips to Dear Abby for the not-yet-married. If you see these red flags, she advises you to dump the guy:

If your parents or siblings have doubts about him, PAY ATTENTION. Listen and check it out.

If your intended has nothing good to say about his ex, beware. This is a pattern. Divorce is rarely only one person's fault.

If his children have nothing to do with him, do not believe him if he says his ex brainwashed them against him. My stepchildren have told me it was because they hated him, and they have good reasons.

Look closely at his credit and job history. They are sure predictors of what your life will be like.

If he's over 30 and has no money, do not let him move in with you, and don't marry him until he's financially solvent. If he has any respect for you (and himself), he'll insist on it.

Be sure in your heart that you can live with him AS IS. You CANNOT change another person.

This is a biggie: Beware if he has no friends. It is not true that they all chose to side with his ex.

If YOUR FRIENDS DISLIKE him, pay attention. This is also true if he hates your friends.

If he has more than one DUI and still drinks, run!

If he is one personality at work or with others and another person alone with you, run.

If he has nothing to do with his parents, investigate why. Don't take his word for it.

If he's an expert at everything and brags a lot, understand that he will turn off a lot of people, eventually maybe even you.

If he has sexual problems, go with him to a doctor before you marry him. Believe me, his problem will become your problem.

If he is emotionally or verbally abusive, it will only get worse. Yelling, name-calling and glowering are classic signs of an abuser.

If he is never wrong and never apologizes, everything will be "your fault" forever. And after years of hearing it, you may even start to accept the blame.

If he does something wrong and says, "That wouldn't have happened if you hadn't (fill in the blank)," that's another sign of an abuser.

And if he's mean to children, pets, or animals, recognize that he's pathological, and the next victim could be you.

Holy shit am I whipped! We had no busboy tonight and we were BUSY!! I was hoping for a nice slow night, but that candle majick I did on sunday is really kicking in gear. My regulars with the baby came in, I carried Sarah all around until we got busy and I had to hand her back to daddy. Sarah's little face scrunched up and she WAILED! That kid did NOT want to go back to daddy! I felt so HORRIBLE! More for sarah than daddy, I don't like to see babies cry. Poor daddy had to hand her off to Grandma, sarah was ok with that. Sweet baby was so cuddily tonight and when people would talk to her, she'd "play shy" and bury her head in my shoulder. She loves our cheif Ohmee, of course she would, he's a funny looking fuck! LOL
I have a cool new toe ring, it's a pentagram. I'm still getting used to it. We have some big whigs of sorts coming to the high school next week. Linda, the teacher I work for asked me to dress up a little (my normal look is no make up, jeans and a t-shirt). I could also see her scanning my cork board and photos to make sure I had nothing that screamed out "Iam a witch!!!". I giggled and told her, "don't worry, I'm not stupid. All of my "witchy" things are very subtle". Unless you practice the craft yourself, you don't pick up on what I have out. I asked Linda "so, my tie dye tank top with the big pentagram is a no no next week?" Not that I'd wear it, but I have to be a smart ass.

I REALLY need a stiff drink right about now. In the middle of cooking dinner on the bbq, I ran out of gas. I'm not in the mood to put on make up and be nice to people. I don't want to go to work tonight. I just want to stay home and get drunk.