Things that are only funny to you because it's 3 am and you are sleep deprived................

Yep, Pudd'n pulled his 3 am wake up call.......with a vengance. I was in a deep sleep when Pudd'n started to bug me for a cup to drink. Steve was already in the bathroom, so I made him go get it. All the while praying that pudd'n will take a few sips and go back to sleep. No such luck, as steve gets back in bed, he notices that one of our MANY pillows is wet. Pudd'n had started to wet the bed, but thankfully stopped. We made him get up and go potty while we examined the bed to make sure the pee only got on the pillow. Yes, the bed's dry and pudd'n comes back to snuggle. Not 10 min later, I feel a wetness. Sure enough, that little shit didn't empty his bladder when he went in the bathroom. He came back into bed and pissed there. Now, he DEFINITLY was not "sleep walking" or "half asleep" when he did this. Autism or no, this kid purposly pissed in our bed.
So we get up and throw stuff in the washer, put towels down and remake the bed. Pudd'n goes into his room to watch tv. As steve and I are laying there, we hear this funky noise. It's my terrier d.d., she's makeing a gacking type noise, but no puke is coming out. S

Steve: what's that?
me: it's d.d.
steve: is she puking?
me: no, she probably just came in from a midnight snack of dog poop. She must of ate a crusty one and some of it got hung up.
Steve: oh THANKS, now I'll have that visual for the rest of the day.......

This sends us into a fit of laughter. We start to imagine just what could of got caught up. Was it a piece of corn? a penut? really old pop that broke off?
Yeah, sleep deprivation does that to you........