Happy St. Pat's to you all. 
I've already started hitting the Bushmill's. My friends and family should be here soon to partake of the feast I have prepared. Here's a joke for you a friend sent me today.
McQuillan walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time
>  removing the olives and placing them in a jar.
> 
> When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, the
>  Irishman started to leave.
> 
>  "S'cuse me", said a customer, who was puzzled over what McQuillan had
>  done, "what was that all about?"
> 
> "Nothin', said the Irishman, "my wife just sent me out for a jar of
>  olives!"
>